FAMILY RESOURCES

AM I BEING MANIPULATED?

During any of these confrontation with a substance abuser who is quite practiced at Sympathy Manipulations, you may find yourself backing off, telling him or her that you love them, that they are worthy, and that you didn’t mean to be critical.

BOUNDARIES

Boundaries are not just for avoiding bad behavior, they are also a tool to focus on positive behavior.

DELUSION

Delusion can strike in any area of our life. But God’s truth relates to every problem we face. God’s truth speaks to every false belief. The path to real life is not down fantasy lane. Real life is when we face God’s truth, and begin to apply it in our daily living.

DRUG ABUSE INTERVENTION

Is your loved one in denial about the severity of their drug or alcohol abuse? Have you tried to talk to them about their problem, but they’re unwilling to accept help?

ENABLING

Enabling behavior, simply put, shields people from experiencing the full impact and consequences of their behavior. Enabling is different from helping and supporting in that it allows the enabled person to be irresponsible.

FORGIVENESS

True forgiveness frees you to move on with God. Don’t stay stuck in your damage and brokenness. If you forgive others, God will do the same to you and enable you to move ahead with him

LIVING WITH GUILT

Don’t let the power of other people’s condemnation rob you of God’s peace. Fix your eyes on Jesus—He is not a condemning God.

LOSING CONTROL

To understand your assumptions about control, it helps to understand what you’ve been telling yourself about it. Your need to control grows out of your experiences, and how they affect your thinking and decision making.

RAISE THE BOTTOM

You can’t force your loved one to get help, but you can “raise the bottom” so they come face to face with reality sooner. It’s a painful process, but “raising the bottom” will bring the benefits of healing so much faster.

RESTORING TRUST

Trust makes us vulnerable to the other person. For you to restore trust when you have been hurt so many times before may be very hard. And there are no guarantees of the future. You may get hurt again.

THEY WON'T LOVE ME

The truth is, you can’t buy love. You can’t earn love. True love is given—freely and unconditionally. But wait—not unconditionally—mature love is given obediently!

WHEN PEOPLE HURT YOU

The normal response to someone who curses you is to curse them back. When we do that we fall into the same sinful gutter the other person is already in. We stoop to their level.

WHEN THEY DON'T WANT HELP

You know how painful it is to watch your loved one heading down a destructive path. And it’s easy to get frustrated when you don’t see any change. But thousands of others have been where you are at—and have seen God’s miracle take place in their loved one.

GOOD PARENTS, PRODIGAL KIDS

If your child is addicted or in trouble with the law or making miserable relationship choices, it’s easy to focus too much on the troubling situation, letting the potential consequences become the driving concern of your prayers. This is like attacking the symptoms rather than the disease, which is separation from Jesus.